Kimberly O'Malley wrote:Although i dont plan on having another baby for atleast another 2 years I find myself questioning whether I want another one at all. I have always said I wanted a big family and I adore my son...its not that he's too much work or anything...I just cant imagine not being able to devote all my time to my little guy. I kinda feel like if I have another one I wont have enough time and attention to go around. Anyone else feel this way?? Or anyone care to make me feel differently???

I have one 2.5 year old daughter right now and my husband and I have decided to only have one child.  This is both our decision and we do not see anything wrong with it.  I  agree with your worries that you will not be able to spend time with your son and not have enough attention to go around if you have another child.  But l think it all depends on your personal perception of marriage and parenthood.  I personally see myself as trying to equally balance the different roles of being a wife, a business partner, a mother and an individual.  These roles do require all my attention, so I make sure that I spend quality time for myself, my husband , our business and our child.  And I am comfortable with this arrangement.  I just do what I feel  is right for me and my family, period.  You need to acknowledge too that there are women  and men who chose to be single and couples who decided not to have any kids at all. And they are fine with their situations. 

Hi Ladies,

 

I have a 6 year old girl ( she just celebrated her b'day  :)  )  For a long ti,e my husband and I both thought we just want one child. Then I chenged my mind and I wanted another one, then I changed my mind again, and I didn not want another one....When my husband said ok lets have another baby I got nervous and though OMG, NO way, no more diapers for me! AND Then lol ( know isit getting boring here ) I said one day ok that is it we are having another one! BOOM! We had my son Riley, As I said my daughter is 6 years old and my son is 17 months old. It is the best thing ever to have my kids! I am so glad we have 2 even though it is challenging and it seems I ignore my daugher a lot for my son...( he is a busy boy so I have to keep an eye on him at all times )  BUT My husband helps me and we help each other so we can both spend quality time with Chloe - like take her to the movies, or park time alone etc so she know she is love and we care. From day one my daugher adores her brother, never leaves him alone, cares for him like a little mommy and bugs him too lol....BUT I think and i know that a brother was the BEST gift I could give her! Any time I look at them i go teary ( yes when they play nice ) eyed and know I did the right thing by having another baby even though there are very challenging times sometimes!

The gae difference does not matter there are always challenges....But I am glad I have 2 kids. NO MORE though! Not for me! I also wanted a second baby since I do not have any family here. I am from Hungary, and on my husbands side ( canadian ) we only have my in-laws as family member and his borther and they all live far.  So family is important to me since there are no aunts for my kids here and no ocousins etc.....a little brotther was perfect for her.

Tunde 

The first two years are challenging, but after that is easier because they play together and the older one learn to share. I don't have all the energy but two kids can play all day long.

cheers

Julie . wrote:

For those that did have a second one - what would you say are the hardest things, the most challenging ones that happen once the second child comes into the picture?

To make sure they both get the one on one time. I do mom daughter things since most my attention goes to my Busy Body Riley to make sure he is safe on the playground etc...So for me this is still the hardest part during the day to entertain both. They play well for most part...BUT...  :)  You get the picture lol.....Just make sure you take time one on one to do something fun they love to do. My hubby helps me too with the kids...I still get my mommy time but couple time is a bit more difficult to get. I need to find a good sitter since I have no family here!

I have 3 under the age of 4 [ ...for a few more days anyway!] and I questioned it in the beginning too- how could one love another baby as much as you love your first. trust me, there is so much love , time and [hopefully] patience to go around! I make a point of devoting special time to each of my babies, but we spend so much time as a love-filled group. We have so much fun!!!